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Really? [ David Blake? Well, it is Baphomet. ] He would.

[ Oh, then maybe he does know... ] Did the sensitive matter have to do with the weird post Persephone made on the network a few days ago?

And the Deicide that wasn't committed? Or not-quite committed? [ David sounds a touch distant, like he's pulled away from the phone, slightly. ]

Unfortunately.

There isn't much about this, beyond some myths involving dismemberment and decapitation. Nothing...quite to this level.

[ HAHA WHAT WOULD DAVID BLAKE KNOW ABOUT THIS?? ]

Yeah. That.

I can't figure out a thing about it. I mean, is it some sort of ritual sacrifice thing? [ Sometimes it's hard not to curse around him, although she's making an attempt- usually not for anything he's said, but for the ridiculous circumstances. ] And what does it have to do with the time limit, if anything? It fits the things Ananke told us before she died, but outside that, it's just...disconnected from everything.

It could be sacrifice, I suppose... [ There's a pause, and then a slight echo -- David's clearly put this on speakerphone, and there's the sound of movement. Cassandra always brings out his loquatious side. ]

But for what end? And what does it have to do with the rest of this? What part did the machine play? Is that a new modern experiment? [ He sighed. ]

I take it you have no more hints than I do?

[ God, the fucking Machine. She cringes just at the mention of it. ]

Honestly? I don't think I have much more than you do. None of us do. Ananke said some weird s...things before she died, but even with this they still don't make complete sense. I just need to figure out where to start.

Some weird... Shit? [ Despite himself, David sounds amused. ] You don't have to censor yourself, Miss Igarashi. I've heard far worse -- and it may surprise you to know, I've said worse too.

[ A long pause. That's just distraction from the real point, and not even intentional. ]

Do you think she ever said anything to them? Or do you think anyone else might have any details? Someone has to have heard something.

I'm sure. It's just weird, is all. [ She has an Academic Mode about these things. ]

You mean the heads? Or people who were heads. [ What a phrase! ] Maybe. But Inanna doesn't seem to have learned much, other than...what happened to them.

We all think Woden might know more. But it's not like it's safe to just have him sit down and tell us everything.

[ A thoughtful note. ]

I wish I could wager a guess. I think the inter-pantheon side will have to be your wheelhouse. I can... maybe keep digging. Supposedly, I have perfect recall of all mythology from our world, but... that likely does little good unless I can contextualize it with our pantheons.

Which, of course, the porter didn't seem keen on giving me, either. There must be something...

Wait, is that the power the Porter gave you? [ She hadn't even thought to ask. ] That would be really useful. Why are you not sure about it?

[ She tested her own powers pretty quick. They're there, alright. ]

It would be a great deal more useful if I had perfect recollection of every pantheon as well.

[ A beat. ] It gave me that and... [ A shuffle, as if he's pulling out a folder. ] Sustenance from "dad jokes"? I don't know if that one works, or not. I haven't really had reason to use them. It's been...too chaotic. I haven't felt much like joking in quite some time.

[Just dig that knife in a little deeper. ]

[ She gives a sort of half-laugh, bitterly. ] It sure would be.

[ But...huh. That does give her pause. He knows that she knows he's a dad, at least, but not the other part of it. ] What does an omnipresent kidnapper think counts as a "dad joke"? It's...weirdly specific for a power.

I agree. [ A pause, and then he brightened. ] Ah! But Jon explained it to me, once. He said it's when I'm... making a joke that's only funny if you've been trying to sanitize your humor for so long that it's almost ludicrous.

[ God, that Jon Blake, eh? ] Good, clean fun? I haven't triggered it yet, but I'm sure it will come once I'm...used to this place.

[ Ah. Yeah. Jon Blake. Without him here to look at her, she's making a "hrrmm" face. That does sound like something Woden would say. ]

I was more thinking that it's hard to define one in the first place...let alone to have some sort of thing that claims it's a non-human entity define what it is. Or what she counts as "sustenance."

[ A pause. ] ...Maybe I'm thinking about it too hard.

That's in our job description, isn't it?

[ He sounds vaguely amused. ] But maybe... it's not so much as she claims it, as that the government couldn't define it by anything other than that? Maybe that's how they contextualize a much more vague and indiscernible concept?

[ She snickers. ] Yeah, but then who's the guy who got "dad jokes" put on an official government document?

Someone with a fine sense of humor, perhaps? Maybe they're an American hero for doing it? When else will they get the opportunity to do something like that?

American hero seems like an exaggeration, but- for the last one, yeah, maybe. Who knows.

It's strange, though. Everyone else I've met has pretty...exact power specifications. I hope they weren't just messing around the day you got pulled in.

They do? What sorts of specifications? I just --

It would be my luck, to get something like this, I suppose. I was bemoaning it when I arrived but...it seems rather immature of me to be upset that I can't... [ a pause, Cassandra can probably hear the handwave and eyeroll all in one. ] Fly, or lift things.

I think that would be ludicrous.

I mean, they're usually at least more specific than "dad jokes."

It's bizarre. I've heard of people who could do enough back home that the Porter didn't even bother to change anything. [ She makes kind of a "tsk" noise. ] They're lucky. Probably easier to know you haven't been messed with.

I agree. [ A soft sigh. ]

Not that I don't...enjoy the prospect. It's...interesting? Maybe that's because I'm just a boring old human. It's something I never thought I'd even be close to experiencing, at least. For you all, I am sure it's much worse.

It's creepy, but I think most of the rest of the Pantheon just think it's bizarre. It doesn't seem like any of us really got weaker or stronger, even if we got more inexplicable magic to do.

Is it... It seems violating, if I can be honest. [ A soft sigh. ]

Even moreso when your divinity is involved. It's a very personal thing, I would think, to have someone change it. Alter it. I know you're far less of a believer, but...

I'm surprised the rest of them don't complain about it more. They're the ones who are so into it being a part of themselves, as if they're...different people or something. I'm far more concerned with them putting machines into our bodies than the powers.

I understand that, certainly. [ A beat. ] You're correct, it's curious they aren't...concerned with such things. None of them have expressed any such issues? Truly?

They definitely haven't told me if they're disturbed about it. [ In a very "god these fucking teens" tone. ] Maybe they're too distracted by having a whole new world to perform to or something.

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